Not that I’m a princess.
I don’t usually delve into the disease-specific, but this week I am going to interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to complain about a diabetes nuisance.
I am a Type 1 diabetic, and as such, I am lucky to have an insulin pump. It is stuck to my body and delivers a constant stream of insulin to keep my blood sugars even. I wear it mostly on the waist of pants or shorts. It jumps off occasionally when I move the wrong way, but it is durable enough that it doesn’t matter.
No, the problem comes when I go to sleep. I have never been a quiet sleeper. I don’t snore, but I do move. When I was little and used to crawl into bed with my parents, I kicked. My mom was not shy about letting me know, either. These days, no matter what position I start in, usually on a side, I end up like an infant – on my back with my arms up, like I’m calling a touchdown.
And how do I get there? I turn. I toss. Which moves my pump, which has to be attached at all times. I have tried putting it next to me (digs into my side), on the other side of the bed (migrates to a hip), under a bunch of pillows across the bed (somehow ends up under my head), and on the floor (it pulls). The cord is 43 inches long. I am only 64 inches long. It should be plenty of room to stay far away from me. But rolling over on it always wakes me up since it’s roughly 3.5” x 2” x 1” hard plastic. This happens at least several times a week. It’s one thing to wake up because I have to use the bathroom, or to register the awareness that comes with sleep stage 1, or even if one of the pump alarms goes off, but waking me from a sound sleep for no reason at all is a different story altogether.
It makes me feel like the Princess and the Pea, that fairy tale about the girl whose pedigree was tested by a prospective monster- um, mother-in-law when she snuck a single pea between two mattresses in a stack of 20. (She didn’t want her son to get stuck with a fake princess.) Apparently, the princess didn’t sleep a wink and woke up bruised from the little vegetable. According to the fairy tale, only a princess would have such delicate skin.
I assure you, I am not that delicate, but that pump sure makes me feel that way sometimes.